The following is a script for Heinz Salad Cream. The idea for the campaign came from the insight that the words 'salad' and 'cream' to describe a sauce really makes little sense.
It won the 2012 YCN Award.
The wonderful world of names is really quite absurd
for have you heard
that there is a word for insects, that is ladybird?
Have you ever because I have never
been greeted with a pine in my apple.
It really is quite dandy, and something quite outstanding
that a lion and a flower
should be crossed with one another.
Oh the words of one, are but never done, can you imagine
the delight that butter had
when introduced to the nut that then was squashed?
Oh by gosh!
It really is a mad world out there
for the day that lettuce met a cow; for only Jim knows how.
From their meeting grew a glorious concoction;
a substance most boggling.
With a zing and a zang and a yum and a pang;
a taste was born.
Enjoyed on crumpets and chips, aeroplanes and ships;
a flavour that travels the world.
Had by little boys and little girls,
brothers and sisters, misses and misters;
make of it it you will.
On riverbanks, mountains, deserts and dunes;
whether this side of earth or the other side of the moon.
Any place or time is perfectly fine
to embrace the taste that is so divine.
You know what we mean when we say Salad Cream.
Salad Cream. It makes perfect nonsense.